January 1, 2024

What is a Keeton-ism? I am so glad you asked. Keeton had a very unique perspective about life. Sometimes it did not make sense to everyone else, but it made perfect sense to him. However, once he connected the dots for you, his logic worked (kind of). He also did not always use his filter. If a thought came to his mind, it was probably going to come out of his mouth. Sometimes this got him in trouble, but his adorableness saved him. This created very comical, but enlightening moments. Sometimes the moments became lessons for Keeton, but other times, the lessons were for those engaged in the conversation. If you purchased a 2024 planner, you will find a Keeton-ism on each month. I will be writing about the conversation that led up to lesson, as well as how we can apply Keeton's wisdom to everyday life.

January's Keeton-ism: Sometimes you just have to accept things and ride the crazy train together.

Ayden and I were both blessed to be recipients of this lesson courtesy of Keeton. The conversation occurred in September 2020, during virtual learning. Both boys went to school with me each day. They logged into their classes in the morning, and completed assignments in the afternoon. I taught my classes through zoom in the afternoon. Having them as my office mates for 311 days sure made my days very busy, but interesting to say the least. 

Another thing people need to understand about Keeton is that as spontaneous as he was, he thrived with routine. He needed to know what was coming all the time. Sudden changes in routine had the potential to derail him the entire day. He did learn strategies to cope with sudden changes, but we tried to keep him on a schedule and routine. Keeton needed to be in bed by 8:00pm. He needed every minute of his sleep to keep from being a grumpy gus in the morning, but he also liked to stall his bedtime. He could be asleep in a matter of minutes if he would just be still and quiet. However, that time alone in his room gave his brain time to come up with some of the most outlandish thoughts imaginable, and of course, he had to share them immediately. To make sure he got all the sleep he needed, he would start his bedtime routine around 7:45. I knew that I would end up tucking him in bed at least 3 times before he would settle down enough to sleep. Most times Ayden would join me in this venture. Ayden and I would sit beside Keeton for about 10 minutes and pray with him, read a devotional, and talk about the day. This would prevent multiple trips to the living room to say, "Hey mama or hey Aydie. Did you know (fill in any knowledge that Keeton came up with in the minutes before)?" 

I am going to add some commentary in red, just to help those who never had the privilege of engaging in a Keeton conversation or never became the recipient of a Keeton-ism.

On this particular night the conversation went as follows:

Keeton: hey mama. I’ve been thinking.

Me: should I be scared?

Keeton: of what?

Me: you thinking... that always leads to trouble (Keeton could easily identify his own unique thoughts and prefaced them with "hey..." to prepare the listener. I accepted Keeton's perspective a long time ago and never let it worry me unless I felt there was a danger of Keeton hurting someone's feelings.) 

Keeton: well yeah probably does. But it’s destined to happen, so we just soon cept it now and ride this crazy train together. (You can see that Keeton was well aware of his view on life. He just learned to find the joy in life. At such a young age, he knew how joy worked.)

Me: ok well here’s my ticket for the crazy train. What have you been thinking about?

Ayden: Nooooooo! Don’t ask. Have you learned nothing in the last 8 years? (Puts face in hands) (Oh my sweet Ayden! Ayden did have a quirky, silly side, but he didn't show it to everyone. He was forever the serious big brother. He balanced his brother perfectly. He knew to expect the unexpected when it came to Keeton. At this point, he was still learning to accept the unexpected.)

Keeton: oh Aydie. (Imagine Keeton waving Ayden off. Also, Keeton was the only one who could get away with calling Ayden, Aydie! That was the cue that Keeton was in little brother mode.) No need for dramatics. (Keeton seemed to forget that he was the one known for dramatics.) I’ve been thinking about the worst part of virtual school in Google Meets.

Me: (sigh of relief)

Ayden: ok this might not be so bad (Aydie, we thought it was safe. We should have known better.)

Me: what is the worst part of virtual school?

Keeton: well, there’s always this one kid who thinks he’s being all quick like no one can see him and he  picks his nose. Well that’s the moment the google freezes and I’m stuck looking at this kid with his finger stuck in his nose for like 10 minutes.  If we were in school, he would have finished getting the booger, washed his hands, put on hanitizer, swapped the laundry, fed the class pet, and turned in his homework in the 10 minutes it takes him on the frozen google. It’s just too much for my eyes to handle. Don’t you agree mommy? (Why he threw in the information about the laundry, I will never know. And yes, Google was called "the Google" all the time, and hand sanitizer was always shortened to hanitizer. I don't think any of his teachers ever had a class pet either.)

Me: (speechless)

Ayden: we just had to get on the train. Is there a stop coming up? I need to exit. (Sometimes Ayden and I would question Keeton's logic, but that would only encourage him to continue the shenanigans. By this point, it was way past his bedtime, so the conversation needed to end. Besides, Ayden was learning when to just accept it and ride the crazy train. In this case, he did look for a way off, so he did not entertain Keeton. I just didn't know how to respond. It made me think about how often the internet freezes during class time and what facial expressions freeze on my students' computers. Thanks for creating some paranoia, Bug!) 

So what did Ayden and I learn in this interaction? 

In this conversation, Keeton was very focused on the kid picking his nose during virtual learning. I did make sure it was not Keeton who was caught with his finger up his nose. To him, that was the worst part of not being able to attend school face-to-face. He couldn't control the pandemic, the mandates for schools, the work his teachers assigned, or the separation from his friends. At eight-years-old, he knew there were things in life outside of his control. He also knew that fixating on what was outside of his control would steal his joy. 

There was nothing Ayden or I could do about who God made Keeton to be. Keeton did struggle with his size, but he fully embraced the robust personality God gave him. Keeton knew he could not change or control people anymore than Ayden could change or control him. To Keeton, life was a crazy train full of circumstances, some we could control and some beyond our control. Granted, Keeton could not control the kid picking his nose on camera, but Keeton could control his own response to the situation. (I am just thankful that Keeton did not call this poor child out during class. How embarrassing would that have been?)  

For Keeton, we have two choices: accept there are things we can't control and ride through life laughing with those we love, or stress over the things we cannot control or change and allow it to steal our joy. If you can't tell by now, Keeton chose joy and laughter. When my days get so bogged down in the grief, I have to channel my inner-Keeton and choose joy.

So if this post finds you on a day where you are struggling with things beyond your control, find someone to ride the crazy train with you. Let go of what you can't control and hold onto the joy. And just in case you are struggling to find your joy and laughter, I am giving you 59 seconds of Keeton's giggles. His smile and laughter are contagious. You can even hear Ayden in the background laughing towards the end.